Cartoon Impy

New baby alert.

For those of you who would care. . .

Emily Bjornberg (formally Gerber) gave birth yesterday at 10:39 to her first child. His name is Elliot Merrill Bjornberg and both are doing quite well. Emily had evidentally smoked bad crack and initially tried to have the baby with no drugs. Um, yeah, didn't work so well so she got an epidural. Elliot is 7 pounds 6 ounces.

Its nice once in a while to bring good tidings.
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    Air conditioner
Cartoon Impy

Fresh Prince of Bel Air

Weird survey. Dave and I were watching Fresh Prince since nothing else was on this evening. He was amazed by how Janice and I knew all the words to the opening theme song. I argued that pretty much anyone in the early nineties under the age of 30 knew at least most of the song. (Granted, its not that complicated.) To settle the debate, am I right?
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    Shakira-- Underneath Your Clothes
Cartoon Impy

Heating problems

No heat again for Dave and Katie. The furnace people came out and (supposedly) fixed it yesterday. However, since our radiator is ancient and our rental office has decided not to replace it, we have no heat yet again. So I woke up shivering and our living room was a balmy 52.

Point is that if you hear of a Fredericksburg Caldwell Banker office being blown up, then I will need an alibi.
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    Ani-- Not A Pretty Girl
Cartoon Impy

Happy New Year.

Hope everyone had a happy New Year. I had a good one and I stayed sober!

In other news I'd highly recommend an article in this month's Vanity Fair. Yes, I know its Vanity Fair. Yes, I know what most people think of the magazine. However, there is an article by Christopher Hitchens that touches on one of the most terrifying and sad of African realities and one that most of the Western word has never heard of. The article concerns the Lord's Resistence Army and its leader, Joseph Koby. For 20 years Koby has been kidnapping small (under 12) Ugandan children, turning them into soldiers through torture and rape, then sending them back into their villages to kidnap more children for him. Over 20,000 children have been lost to this man. Anyhow, its a really haunting and good article.

In much lighter news, Good Omens is being re-released in hardback in Feb. with a choice of 2 covers! Just in time for my birthday.
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    me sneezing
Blue Impy

Ahh the NYT.

Op-Ed Columnist: The 12 Days of Rummying

December 12, 2004

On the first day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
a Saddam pigeon in a palm tree.
Not knowing Osama's
Rummy hastened to 'Potamia - and a mess,
exhorting his pal Cheney,
"Let's bomb Baghdad again, golly

On the second day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
two dead-ender turtle doves
and Kofi),
flowers and chocolates from the ninny Chalabi,
and a billion Arabs mad at me.

On the third day of
my Rummy sent to me
three French henpeckers and imaginary W.M.D.
And 300 tons
of lost explosives
going BOOM! everywhere.
Rummy tried for a Vin Diesel movie,
when he should have
heeded General Shinseki.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
four cuckoo birds -
Wolfie, Perle,
Feith and Condi.
The cost of empire on the cheap will be steep.
How did
Rummy get a job guarantee?

On the fifth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
Pentagon rings.
Rummy wanted to go down in history
by transforming the military.
But many G.I.'s feel
that their forces and matériel are depleted.
Stop Loss and Stuff Happens, by Jiminy!

On the sixth day
of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
six German shepherds teeth a-baring.
A hooded man attached
to wires,
Abu Ghraib and Army liars,
Red Cross in the dark
about dogs that liked to bark.

the seventh day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
regime change that wasn't free,
our troops sitting ducks
for I.E.D.
(Improvised Explosive Devices,
dear me)
Rummy is another sort of I.E.D.
(Instant Excuses for
"I'm an old man, don't you see?")

On the eighth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
Osama videotapes.
The Bushie fever with Saddam
left Osama free to scram.
Invading Iraq was an Xmas gift

for bin Laden - a recruiting lift.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
and North Korea
on a nuclear buildup spree.
Nine mullahs a-proliferating,
as our military's straining.

The Bushies were fixated on Iraq,
but Saddam's weapons were merely the mock.

On the tenth
day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
ten Gitmo lawyers a-leaping.
What cares he
about civil

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
eleven generals a-hyping that the war
is just dandy,
while our spooks are warning
that civil war and theocracy are a-borning
as the Kid in
the Oval feels free
to consult a Higher Authority.
Burkas, turbans and beards you'll see
after the puppet
Allawi. On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
a brave grunt from Tennessee
about his unarmored Humvee.
No twelve drummers drumming,
but twelve soldiers thrumming,
complaints to Rummy keep
but the septuagenarian's not admitting
that the Iraq resistance isn't quitting.
The Ghost of
Christmas Past, Mekong Delta,
is clanking after Rummy in Samarra.
Eleven generals
Ten Gitmo lawyers not grinning,
Nine Iranian mullahs Iraq annexing,
Eight Osama tapes
Seven bombs a-scaring,
Six German geese bewaring,
Five Pentagon rings,
cuckoos a-raving,
Three French hens appeasing,
Two dead doves,
And a Saddam pigeon sparking an
  • Current Music
    Computer humming.
Blue Impy

Damn Gina. That's pretty scary.

20 Questions to a Better Relationship

eXpressive: 3/10
Practical: 4/10
Physical: 3/10
Giver: 2/10

You are a RSIT--Reserved Sentimental Intellectual Taker. This makes you a Archetypal Older Child.

You are a hard nut to crack. You have a wicked sense of humor. Despite your reserved nature, you are more comfortable (and successful) in the meeting and courting mode than you are in a long term relationship. You feel misunderstood, and usually you are.

When you're in a good mood, you're funny, fascinating and a sexy firecracker, but when you're in a bad mood you are moody, broody and impatient. In courtship mode, you don't have to let anyone see your moody side. If you had your way, even in a long term relationship you would have enough time apart to deal with your bad moods yourself; unfortunately, it rarely works that way.

You stifle *a lot* of anger and frustration -- from all areas of your life -- so when it comes out it comes out nasty. More than any other type, your conflicts tend to turn on one tiny thing -- the dishes, the laundry -- that's really a scapegoat for your larger dissatisfactions with your relationship. You're baffled that your partner just can't do the dishes -- your partner is baffled that it's such a big deal. The only way around it is to let the dishes go entirely and try to get at the real root of what's bothering you.

I'm making you sound like a bear, but the fact is that you're so warm and charming most of the time that it effectively offsets the times you're unhappy.

You will make a weirdly good parent.

Don't pair up with someone who'll make sexual demands of you. That's just not going to fly at all.

Of the 14484 people who have taken this quiz, 6 % are this type.
Blue Impy

Meme stolen from Chad.

My 21 favorite books in no particular order: (Please bear in my mind, they are my favorite books, not necessarily are they good ones)

1. The Pistachio Prescription- Paula Danziger
2. Good Omens- Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
3. The Joy Luck Club- Amy Tan
4. The Fran Lebowitz Reader- Fran Lebowitz
5. To Kill A Mockingbird- Harper Lee
6. Snow Crash- Neal Stephenson
7. Zodiac- Neal Stephenson
8. Love in the Time of Cholera- Gabriel Garcia Marquez
9. In Search of Respect: Selling Crack in El Barrio- Phillippe Bourgois
10. Schoolgirls- Peggy Ornstein
11. Bridge to Terabithia- Katherine Patterson
12. Princess- Jean Sasson
13. The Hours- Michael Cunningham
14. The Secret Garden- Frances Hodgson Burnett
15. The Princess Bride- Willliam Goldman
16. Deerskin- Robin McKinley
17. The Awakening- Kate CHopin
18. May You Be the Mother of a Hundred Sons: A Journey Among the Women of India- Elisabeth Bumiller
19. Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood- Rebecca Wells
20. An Acceptable Time- Madeline L'Engle
21. Wonderboys- Michael Chabon

Oh and Primary Colors by Anonymous and Cider House Rules by John Irving.
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    10,000 Maniacs- Because the Night
Blue Impy

F*cking construction.

I have no water pressure. I can't shower. I can't flush my toilets. I can't even brush my teeth. They turned off the water pressure for the assloads of construction going on without telling anyone in my complex. And I have to go out to work today looking like I do thanks to said lack of toilet.

I'm going to f*cking kill the City of Fredericksburg.
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    Blink 182- Adam's Song