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Subject:Ahh the NYT.
Time:10:14 am
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Op-Ed Columnist: The 12 Days of Rummying

December 12, 2004
By MAUREEN DOWD





On the first day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
a Saddam pigeon in a palm tree.
Not knowing Osama's
address,
Rummy hastened to 'Potamia - and a mess,
exhorting his pal Cheney,
"Let's bomb Baghdad again, golly
gee!"

On the second day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
two dead-ender turtle doves
(Colin
and Kofi),
flowers and chocolates from the ninny Chalabi,
and a billion Arabs mad at me.

On the third day of
Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
three French henpeckers and imaginary W.M.D.
And 300 tons
of lost explosives
going BOOM! everywhere.
Rummy tried for a Vin Diesel movie,
when he should have
heeded General Shinseki.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
four cuckoo birds -
Wolfie, Perle,
Feith and Condi.
The cost of empire on the cheap will be steep.
How did
Rummy get a job guarantee?

On the fifth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
five
Pentagon rings.
Rummy wanted to go down in history
by transforming the military.
But many G.I.'s feel
cheated,
that their forces and matériel are depleted.
Stop Loss and Stuff Happens, by Jiminy!

On the sixth day
of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
six German shepherds teeth a-baring.
A hooded man attached
to wires,
Abu Ghraib and Army liars,
Red Cross in the dark
about dogs that liked to bark.

On
the seventh day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
regime change that wasn't free,
our troops sitting ducks
for I.E.D.
(Improvised Explosive Devices,
dear me)
Rummy is another sort of I.E.D.
(Instant Excuses for
Disaster,
"I'm an old man, don't you see?")

On the eighth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
eight
Osama videotapes.
The Bushie fever with Saddam
left Osama free to scram.
Invading Iraq was an Xmas gift

for bin Laden - a recruiting lift.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
Iran
and North Korea
on a nuclear buildup spree.
Nine mullahs a-proliferating,
as our military's straining.

The Bushies were fixated on Iraq,
but Saddam's weapons were merely the mock.

On the tenth
day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
ten Gitmo lawyers a-leaping.
What cares he
about civil
liberty?

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
eleven generals a-hyping that the war
is just dandy,
while our spooks are warning
that civil war and theocracy are a-borning
as the Kid in
the Oval feels free
to consult a Higher Authority.
Burkas, turbans and beards you'll see
after the puppet
Allawi. On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my Rummy sent to me
a brave grunt from Tennessee
griping
about his unarmored Humvee.
No twelve drummers drumming,
but twelve soldiers thrumming,
complaints to Rummy keep
coming,
but the septuagenarian's not admitting
that the Iraq resistance isn't quitting.
The Ghost of
Christmas Past, Mekong Delta,
is clanking after Rummy in Samarra.
Eleven generals
spinning,
Ten Gitmo lawyers not grinning,
Nine Iranian mullahs Iraq annexing,
Eight Osama tapes
perplexing,
Seven bombs a-scaring,
Six German geese bewaring,
Five Pentagon rings,
Four
cuckoos a-raving,
Three French hens appeasing,
Two dead doves,
And a Saddam pigeon sparking an
insurgency.

http://www.nytimes.com/2004/12/12/opinion/12dowd.html?ex=1103858284&ei=1&en=3fc522a92016fcb0
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matildawormwood
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Time:2005-05-16 03:37 pm (UTC)
katie! this is smashley! i'm adding you! hi!
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